The Domino Effect!

Last day of September - where did the month go?  By now, things have settled into place at school - for now - although there are thunder clouds on the horizon, aren't there!

I'm now working on Grade 4 of my publishing contract and in the course of reading some Ministry documents on the Fundamentals for Math, I came across the recommendation for three games.  One of the games was called Domino Drop.  When I did a search I found several references to an app called Domino Drop, including this recommendation .  It's on a site called Learning Works for Kids and it looks to be another reference source I'm going to follow.

This is what the screen looks like for Domino Drop.  

When you read the recommendations on the site for the App, you'll see that two Executive Functioning Skills are addressed: Planning and Organization.  There are also some basic math-related skills.  So I paid the grand price of just under $3.00, and added it to my iPad.

But here's the thing - that was not the game or the app the Ministry was recommending!  Eventually I found another Ministry document (and this was a true gem) with many games to supplement classroom learning.   The game Domino Drop was one of them.  But it is an entirely different game, although 'real' dominoes are involved.

It's a great game to reinforce beginning arithmetic skills of 'One More Than' and 'Two More Than' facts. Because students can easily recall the next number (+1) or the number after that (+2), it is advisable to begin instruction with “one-more-than” and “two-more-than” facts (see Strategy Cues below).

But also look at this game as another tool/strategy for reinforcing Executive Functions, particularly Focusing, Impulse control, and Organization.

Intrigued, I found John's domino set and today my student and I played.  We adapted some of the instructions from the Ministry.  Here's my adaptation for two players:

Materials:

• a set of dominoes, divided equally between two players
• Strategy cues: (use the first 6 for younger students)
• one more than
• two more than
• one less than
• two less than
• take away one
• take away two
• add one
• add two
• plus one
• plus two
• one less
• two less

How to Play:

• Choose a strategy cue (one more than, two more than, etc.)
• Arrange an equal number of dominoes between the two of you, face down.
• Turn one domino over, and place it in the centre of the playing area.
• Take turns using the chosen strategy to try to make a match to the centre domino.  If the strategy is “one more than” and the domino that is face up has a 2 and a 5, a player would need to have a domino with a 3 or 6 to match. If the player cannot make a match, she/he selects one additional domino from the collection and tries to make a match. If not, the turn is over and the other player plays. Play continues until one player has played all their dominoes.
• Extension: Give players two strategy cards at a time (any combination of one more than, two more than, one less than, two less than) so that they can use either strategy when making a match.

Finally, an update on Tenzi:

I did buy the card pack 77 Ways to Play Tenzi to supplement my Tenzi Pack  (see earlier post).  We played it many times with Florence and Luke (grandchildren) at the cottage, and it was the game of choice for Florence!

Have fun.  Coming next - using calendars to keep us all organized!

Welcome back to September 2019!

I hope everyone had a good summer.  I finished mine by participating in Hurricane Dorian in Nova Scotia but feel rather blessed that all we experienced were 48 hours without power, worrying about whether we'd be able to get gas for our rental car, not getting cell service, and not being able to see some of the sites in Nova Scotia.  Not so much for the thousands who were without power for many days.

I did spend several hours, at the cottage, listening in on some webinars about Executive Functions.  I'll share some thoughts with you over the next few days, but here's are two resources to help understand the after-school melt-downs.

The first is a webinar from Understood.org with thoughts on the subject.

The second is a quick read, courtesy of The Globe and Mail.  I've read similar stories about teens coming home from school and acting out in the same way.  Empathy for all that they go through!

OPINION

SARAH ROSENSWEET

SPECIAL TO THE GLOBE AND MAIL

PUBLISHED SEPTEMBER 9, 2019UPDATED SEPTEMBER 9, 2019

Question: My eight-year-old child is coming home from school every day and falling apart. No matter what I do, she’s grumpy at best and has a meltdown at worst. I know she’s tired and we are trying to get her to bed earlier. Is there anything else I can do?

Answer: Ah, the after-school meltdown. You are not alone. It’s especially common when school starts and our children are experiencing change in routine and new demands. Let’s talk about why it happens and what you can do about it.

I’m going to assume your daughter hasn’t reported any difficulties at school (or on the bus, etc.) and that you’ve spoken with her teacher to confirm that everything is going reasonably well. Trouble at school needs to be ruled out.

Getting more sleep is a great idea. Tired children (and parents) find it harder to stay emotionally regulated. We also want to make sure that she has a snack after school to avoid the “hangries” (hungry plus angry). Ideally, she can finish her lunch or you can bring a snack when you pick her up. Low blood sugar can aggravate the after-school meltdown.

If you can check “tired” and “hungry” off your list of possible causes of her after-school difficulties, and she’s still having a hard time? There are a few more reasons why the meltdowns could be happening and some effective strategies to help her.

Your daughter is likely working really hard to be “good” at school. She needs to listen to the teacher and pay attention, follow the rules of the classroom, and navigate interactions with her friends and peers. It is a lot of work. When she gets home, she can’t keep it together any longer.

We’ve all been there. Maybe you’ve been on a diet and stuck to it all day, only to eat a big piece of cake at 11 p.m. after a long day. Or maybe you’ve been patient all day with your employees, and then come home and snapped at your partner or your children. Our willpower has been used up.

The American Psychological Association reports that “some experts liken willpower to a muscle that can get fatigued from overuse.” We, children and adults alike, can only keep it together for so long before we fall apart. This could be part of what’s causing the after-school meltdown. She really is doing the best she can.

Your daughter also likely has some stored-up tensions and emotions from the day that she hasn’t been able to let out. Maybe the teacher scolded her or maybe her friend didn’t want to play with her at recess. Maybe she missed you.

When we feel stressed, our bodies pump out chemicals such as cortisol and adrenalin. When we have big feelings that we can’t process in the moment, we hold onto them until it feels safe to let them out. This happens to grown-ups as well: We want to cry at our desks during a rough day, but we push the feelings away until we feel safe to let them out. The stored-up tensions and emotions can make us feel irritable, anxious and grumpy. Cue the meltdown.

What can you do?

Try to make after school as undemanding as possible. She’s already used up most of her willpower and resources. Now is not the time for play dates or extracurricular activities.

If she walks in grumpy, try a hug and a few minutes of quiet together time. If that doesn’t restore her equilibrium, get her laughing before she has a chance to fall apart.

Use laughter to release the tensions and stored-up big feelings. You can actually prevent the after-school meltdown by spending 10 or 15 minutes laughing together.

Laughter actually changes the body’s chemistry. It reduces the physical symptoms of stress by clearing our bodies of those chemicals that make us feel anxious and grumpy. Laughter improves our mood. When we laugh, our bodies create endorphins, powerful feel-good chemicals. Our bodies also produce the bonding hormone oxytocin when we laugh. Ever wonder why we are drawn to those who make us laugh?

Some ideas: Get silly with a roughhousing game.

My children loved it when I would make them into a pizza. Roll out the “dough” (massage her body), and spread on some imaginary “sauce” and “toppings.” Sometimes the pizza would escape before I could eat it, and I’d have to chase it and catch it. Bop a balloon up in the air and, together, try keeping it from hitting the ground. Smaller kids love a ride around the house on your back or being chased by a silly monster.

Follow her laughter: Do more of whatever she likes. It takes time and effort to do this, but it will make the rest of your day much easier.

I don’t recommend tickling. Tickling can make children feel powerless and out of control, even as they laugh. Tickling laughter doesn’t result in the same release as funny laughter. If your daughter asks for tickling, tickle her a few inches away from her body without touching. Even funnier.

If the laughter isn’t enough?

Respond with empathy. She’s not giving you a hard time, she’s having a hard time. If you can remind yourself that your daughter is doing the best she can, you will be able to respond to her with more compassion and patience. She might need to cry to get out those feelings and tensions if laughter isn’t enough.

She will grow and mature and adjust to the demands of school. Keep providing for her physical needs of food and sleep and an undemanding evening routine, and get her laughing to shed the tensions and process the big feelings. The after-school meltdowns should melt away.

Sarah Rosensweet is a parenting coach who lives in Toronto with her husband and three kids, ages 12, 15 and 18.

Summer Reading Tips

Staying in touch with reading during the summer:

Here are some ideas from Understood.org about staying connected to reading.  The article notes that for some kids, summer means more time than ever to read; for those who struggled during the school year, it might mean even more frustration.  But this post has ideas to motivate even the most reluctant reader.  Find all the ideas here, but here's my summary:

1. Try a Summer Reading Bingo Board.
2. Work with your child to set a goal as to how much of the board to complete in a given time, as
   
   well as making choices as to what to read.  See the post on Developing Self-Determination with more ideas about decision-making!
• Kim Greene, the author of the post on Understood.org notes that too much choice can be overwhelming (for all of us actually).  She suggests giving your child a curated list or checking a list of books for reluctant readers. 
• Here's another page with wonderful lists for all ages.   I see that listed under '9 Great Books for Reluctant Readers in Middle School' is one of my all time favourites - The Invention of Hugo Cabret.  I just finished reading this book with one my students.  Don't be put off by the thickness of this book - half of it is made up of
  
  illustrations (but the illustrations move the story forward; you can't skip them - they are a version of a graphic novel - part text, part illustration).  I attended a lecture by David Booth, one of the all-time great reading educators.  He told about the time he brought the book into one of his classes with struggling readers and they said, "No way, we can't read that; it's too big" but read it they did and they were so proud to tell others about this 'huge' book they had read.  
• The author, Brian Selznick, has written two other books that I've shared with my students: Wonderstruck (also half text, half illustration but this time the text follows a young boy in 1977; the illustrations, intermixed with the text, go back to 1927 and tell the story of a young girl; eventually they meet!);  The Marvels: this time the first half of the story is illustrated, then the latter half is text.  All three books are based on an element of non-fiction. 
3. Reading is reading - graphic novels, audio-books (!), magazines, non-fiction.  
4. Ms Greene suggests leaving books in places where your kids like to 'hang out'.  When my husband and I drove our grandkids to the cottage, I would put a pile of books in the middle of the back seat between the two boys, and within minutes they were reading them.  I'd also pick out audio-books for them to listen to; more than once I thought that they'd tuned out but when I turned the 'book' off, I'd hear, "What???? We were listening to that."  Check out the Hoopla app from your local library for downloading audio-books.
5. Finally, read together.   Check out one my early posts about the benefits of Reading Aloud. 

One final note.  One of my favourite columnists in The Globe and Mail, Elizabeth Renzitti, wrote this past weekend about summer reading.  There is no shame in reading 'brain candy' as I call it; her premise is that one of the roadblocks to reading is the feeling that you have to read what is 'good for us'.  But she writes that the way to 'inject joy back into it (reading)' is 'reading the book less taken.' You'll find 'reading surprises'.  

Enjoy the reading.

 

The Kids' Version of the Learning Skills and Work Habits Part of the Report Card

As I write this in mid-June, I know teachers are busy at work compiling report cards to give parents the best idea of how the year has gone, detailing the strengths, weaknesses, and next steps for each child.  It's not an easy task and I always thought that if I had time, I'd much rather sit down with both child and parent and give them an oral report, showing them exemplars (student work at various levels) and sharing what I'd seen in the classroom that led me to use the grades I did.

For me, the most important part of an elementary report card is the Learning Skills and Work Habits section.  In fact, in my work for GTK Press, editing and modifying Grade 5 and Grade 6 Math, we have incorporated assessment for these Learning Skills and Work Habits right into the 'regular' Assessment package.

In my classroom, I would set time aside to have students assess themselves on these Skills and Habits, and then I'd make time to review with each student their assessment and compare it with mine.  It was seldom that we differed greatly.  We could then set goals for improvement.

To that end, back in 2011, I worked with the teacher of my oldest grandson (and she is, hopefully, reading this Blog post) to create a Kids Version of the Learning Skills and Work Habits.

If your child's teacher is not able to review the Skills and Habits, you can do it.  Print out the document, and then go over each of the skills/habits and ask your child to tell you how she/he thinks she did.  Use some of the 'Kids' Language' to set the stage.  You could ask what skill/habit he wants to work on next term (or during the summer - choose one).

In September, pull out the June report card and the two of you zero in on one or two of skills/habits that could use some improvement.

Finally, everything is connected.  Check out the Executive Functions post and see how the skills/habits line up. The post on Developing Self-Determination has more ideas.

Good luck!

Some Homework Tips

I'm taking full advantage of some of the posts from the Blogs I follow.  This one was originally published in 2017 on Understood.com

Its title (Teacher Tip: 5 Ways to Use Slow Processing Speed Accommodations at Home) could be misleading so I've distilled some of the ideas that would apply to just about every elementary student.

I have mixed feelings about homework, especially in the younger grades, but certainly daily reading at home (and being accountable for it) is a must.  And there are always those projects that need more time at home.

Here goes:

1. Avoid the timer for homework completion.  For some kids, working to the clock, totally works.  It brings out the competitor in them (and it works, as longs as 'beating the clock' does not impact the quality of the work!) For others, it adds undue anxiety to what can be an already stressful assignment. Instead, stick to a routine of x number of minutes (build in some breaks) per task.  
1. Bring your child in on this decision-making (see post about Developing Self-Determination).  Together, set a time limit of how long to stay on task for any one assignment.
2. Same old (place); same old (time). Whenever possible, stick to the routine of doing the homework in the same place and at the same time (not always possible but it's a goal). Keep to a routine of what to do first as well (should it be the Home Reading, or spelling, or Math).  Again, help your child make these decisions and then stick to them.  And if the decisions don't work, or need to be changed up, it's a chance for another discussion about decision-making!
3. Watch the time. This is where a timer works for you.  There are guidelines* for how long a student should spend on homework, depending on grade level and your school board.  When a task is taking too long, or your child is becoming too frustrated for any productive work, call it quits.  Send a note to the teacher explaining how it all went down.  That's helpful for the teacher - she/he now knows that this is a task that probably needs some more class time (it could also be that the student was having difficulty focusing during class time and therefore missed key elements in what was needed to complete the homework task but that's another post!!)
4. Keep it simple. The younger the child, the fewer number of steps in any one set of instructions.  Too many at one time, and it's overwhelming.  Give short, simple instructions, and only one or two at a time; ramp it up as your child develops that skill set of retaining multiple steps.  Rather than, "Hang your coat up, take out your agenda, and then let's get a snack." why not try, "After you hang your coat up, open up your backpack."  When that's done, add, "Now find your lunch boxes and your agenda." (And hopefully there is an agenda or Communication Log in there because you're using the End of Day Buddy System - see earlier post).  

* Homework guidelines statement from a school in York Region: Teachers will: Ensure that homework is appropriate for each age group and includes reading; as a rule, the expected time for homework shall be (10 minutes) X (the grade level)  For example, in Grade 2: 2x 10=20 minutes.

Find the complete set of guidelines for the school here.

What's worked for you?

Developing Self-Determination

One of the blogs I subscribe to is from Brookes Publishing Co.  A recent post was listing strategies for helping children strengthen their self-determination skills.  Although the post was adapted from the book, Getting the Most out of IEPs, by Colleen A. Thoma & Paul Wehman, I thought that there were some good ideas for all students and I've adapted three of them

below to suit my audience. Some apply to younger children and others to older.  You choose.

Just as students need frequent practice with math or literacy skills, they also need daily practice to develop the skills that provide a foundation for self-determination.

1. Offer choices: It could be allowing children to choose where they do their homework (with some limitations based on expectations you have shared); it could be as small as letting them choose the writing implement they want to use to complete the homework.  Let them decide what goes on the checklist described in the previous post (End of Day Buddy System).  With any action, you can start by offering two options and gradually increase the choices.  
2. Model decision-making:  When you're making a decision, talk through it with your children; let them hear the thought-processes that you use to make decisions.  A Pros and Cons list is a great way to help them see what goes into decision-making.
3. Follow-up: When they've made a decision, talk with them about what was good or not so good about the decision they made.  What would they do differently if they could do this again? You can do some follow-up-modeling yourself after a fairly major decision has been made.

The "End of Day Buddy" System

I've been thinking about a student that I taught several years ago who had a difficult time remembering what he had to take home.  I learned from his mom that he'd rush in the door saying, "Hey Mom, I've got this assignment about reindeer that I've started at school.  Look at it." and he'd start digging through his backpack and then look up dejectedly and say. "Oh, I left it at school."

So we created the 'End of Day Buddy" system.  I paired those organizationally-challenged students  with those who were better organized.  In fact, it got to be that I could pair any two students and they would work with each other.  I'd hear - "Do you have ????" and '"Nope, wait, it's right here." and together they helped each other get organized at the end of the day.  It certainly reduced the number of times I would hear from parents about lost assignments or projects.

From a teacher's perspective, it meant ending the 'official' teaching part of the day perhaps five minutes earlier to give students the chance, in a supervised setting, to get themselves organized. But the time spent at the end of the day meant so much more time available in other ways because assignments went home, Communication Logs went home, and we didn't spend time trying to get caught up or figure out what was lost and then start over. Besides, learning how to be organized is a worthwhile skill - see the Learning Habits and Works Skills section of the report card (and coming soon - a post about a student-friendly version of those habits and skills!)

Here's a suggested Checklist from Understood.org that the End of Day Buddies can use.   The suggestion is that the Checklist goes on the backpack.

I like the larger size and would suggest that there be a laminated checklist for the top of the desk or the inside of the locker, as well as the backpack.

Those who have read Smart but Scattered, recommended in an earlier post, will recognize a list such as this one.  Note that lists such as these become 'invisible' with time.  Children are so used to seeing them that eventually they don't!  So switch them up.  After a couple of weeks, review the list together and figure out what can be removed or added.  Maybe change the colour of the paper.  Let your child 'own' it by suggesting what should be on the list and then personalize it (with stickers, drawings etc).

Here's to organization!